Found flier warns of terrorist protesters.
Ongoing anti-fur protests by Portland animal rights activists have helped shut down one fur salon, Schumacher Furs. (The owner unsuccessfully tried to retaliate by calling on federal prosecutors to use the Animal Enterprise Terrorism Act against the protesters).
Now activists are protesting Ungar Furs. But be careful, everyone, the grammatically-impaired right-wingers of the Republic of Portland are not going to take your Constitutionally-protected activity lying down!
“Why wait till they are in front of your business protesting. Stop these Terrorists now! There is something called The Animal Enterprise Terrorism Act that is supposed to protect merchants from these people but the left wingers who run Portland will not stand up for decent folk trying to make a living. If they were protesting in front of a gay vegan hemp store, you bet your ass the city would be trying to stop them. Enough is enough. The last time I looked this was America.”
And the last time I looked there was still a First Amendment.
But hold up, forget all of my typical “protect the Constitution” rhetoric. Gay vegan hemp store? How have I never heard of this magical place?
If such a place were to exist, it would truly represent a “domestic terrorist” Axis of Evil. On this site we’ve seen how Pat Boone is fighting “sexual jihadists” and homo-grown terrorism. We’ve seen how “vegetarians are terrorist scum.” And we’ve seen how environmental activists like Tim DeChristopher are “eco-terrorists.”
This store would reflect a dangerous new development in the War on Terror, and the unification of the gays, the vegans and the hippies into the Holy Trinity of Terrorism.
Maybe it could move in to the vegan mini-mall? I hear the hemp-lovers at Food Fight have a vegan cheese pump.
(Thanks to Chad for sending the photo.)