Remember that publicity stunt, I mean, important work of American literature, that was released a few years back “100 People Who Are Screwing Up America”? I was flipping through it today, and guess who comes in at number 23?
23. The Unknown American Terrorist
Members of the Earth Liberation Front have torched luxury homes, SUVs, and a ski resort, costing Americans millions of dollars in damages. Their goal is to protect the environment through destroying property. Their activities are similar to that of terrorists, as they operate like a loose-network of cells.
The “eco-terrorists” are sandwiched between #22, Michael Newdow (he brought a lawsuit on behalf of his daughter challenging “under God” in the Pledge of Allegiance) and #24, Lee Bollinger (as president of the University of Michigan, he defended affirmative action), affirming “The Green Scare” is more about a culture war than national security. (While ELF property destruction targets the almighty dollar, targeting the almighty Himself is still the greater cultural threat, it seems).
Let’s recap, to see if we can get this all straight:
- Conservatives like Bernard Goldberg say Michael Moore is a greater threat to the U.S. than so-called “eco-terrorists.”
- Meanwhile, the FBI calls the ELF the “number one domestic terrorism threat”.
- And President Bush seemingly thinks so little of this “domestic terrorism threat” that he doesn’t even mention it in his last state of the union address, which focused on– you guessed it– the War on Terrorism.
No Child Left Behind might have left me behind, but the numbers just don’t add up.